My Back Garden Is Now Illegal
So there I was minding my own business, cutting the grass out in the back garden when I spotted a little pile of diced up mushrooms which I hadn't noticed before I ran the lawnmower over them. I thought nothing of it, after all, there's nearly always a mushroom or two growing in a garden, but suddenly my attention was arrested. I noted the staining on the stems. Now if Terence McKenna has thought me anything, it's that mushrooms that bruise blue are [in general] for the win! And likewise, mushrooms that stain yellow are [in general] for the loose!
Mary Harney, in all her "gigantic" wisdom, decided that the number one issue involving the Irish health care system was the use of "evil" magic mushrooms. Magic mushrooms do after all, kill more people in Ireland every year than cancer... in fact, magic mushroom give you cancer. All cancer is caused by magic mushrooms... and magic mushrooms give you AIDS too! In 2006, after a single man died from skulling a lethal dose of alcohol and gulping down all kinds of fungus he found growing in his rubbish bin, Mary Harney pushed through a law that not only banned the sale of magic mushrooms but it also banned the indiginous growth of shrooms throughout Ireland! And she managed to do it in a single week! Meanwhile the HSE is falling apart and all we get is the same old fucking "well, making changes takes time" bullshit!
So I'm wondering, should I should go to my local Garda station and report the illicit activities that my garden is engaged in? If I did, might you say I was "grassing it up"? heehee :) Technically I was actually breaking the law in the above pic as I was "in possesion" of a controlled substance, on the same level as heroin or cocaine. But hey, as long as the Guards don't find my "Josef Fritzl" styled basement, I'm laughing!
Posted at 19:21