So there I was minding my own business, cutting the grass out in the back garden when I spotted a little pile of diced up mushrooms which I hadn't noticed before I ran the lawnmower over them. I thought nothing of it, after all, there's nearly always a mushroom or two growing in a garden, but suddenly my attention was arrested. I noted the staining on the stems. Now if Terence McKenna has thought me anything, it's that mushrooms that bruise blue are [in general] for the win! And likewise, mushrooms that stain yellow are [in general] for the loose!
Mary Harney, in all her "gigantic" wisdom, decided that the number one issue involving the Irish health care system was the use of "evil" magic mushrooms. Magic mushrooms do after all, kill more people in Ireland every year than cancer... in fact, magic mushroom give you cancer. All cancer is caused by magic mushrooms... and magic mushrooms give you AIDS too! In 2006, after a single man died from skulling a lethal dose of alcohol and gulping down all kinds of fungus he found growing in his rubbish bin, Mary Harney pushed through a law that not only banned the sale of magic mushrooms but it also banned the indiginous growth of shrooms throughout Ireland! And she managed to do it in a single week! Meanwhile the HSE is falling apart and all we get is the same old fucking "well, making changes takes time" bullshit!
So I'm wondering, should I should go to my local Garda station and report the illicit activities that my garden is engaged in? If I did, might you say I was "grassing it up"? heehee :) Technically I was actually breaking the law in the above pic as I was "in possesion" of a controlled substance, on the same level as heroin or cocaine. But hey, as long as the Guards don't find my "Josef Fritzl" styled basement, I'm laughing!
17 comments:
Destination Gamma Goblin Manor for a party to end all parties. I'll bring my copy of Willennium
I demand, and shall hopefully get, those shrooms.
Oh yeah, I have absolutely nothing to post about on my blog.
BMD: It was sounding good until you mentioned that Will Smith ruffian... Maybe he sounds better when you're shponglised?
kczyk: They are already on their way to you, no honest they are!
Admit it...that's not a mushroom...your penis has finally fallen off!
Do you need me to help getting rid of the evidence?
No fix, no fee.
Yes, it was riddled with AIDS.
Carrigaline: I've returned them to Gaia, so that she may bloom once more.
yum! mushrooms already in ireland? we don't see them until late august.
Swedish Chef: Well I can tell you that my garden is currently infested with all kinds of wonderful fungi, although not all are strictly edible :)
Are you saying that magic mushroom sales were LEGAL in Ireland until 2006?
Legal to sell unprocessed mushrooms yes, as well as to possess and grow. It was however, illegal to consume them.
Oh, okay. That makes sense. ;-)
By the way, what type of Psilocybe mushroom is that? We only get Liberty Caps around here, and thought it was the same in Ireland, but that one seems to thick to be a Liberty Cap, no?
I really don't know what type of mushroom it is. I later thought it might have been a young Hygrocybe Conica (they appeared later) which would be more likely take you on a trip to the hospital than anything else, but the cap doesn't seem quite right, it's neither waxy nor the right shape.
It's probably some kind of mutant alien psilocybe mushroom from outer space that landed in your back garden. You should eat it.
I just found 2 of the same shrooms today, you have the only picture I found that has a very conical cap like that, same color, stem was org/yel and blued almost immediately, and is now black an hour1/2 latter. taking a spore print now and if it purple im eating them.
Be careful with the mushroom science. No lawsuits please lol
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