Propellerhead's Record - Line6 Guitar Amp Demo

I said I'd have to throw an audio clip at you since it is an audio program afterall. This is a very simple piece of drum loop wankery fed through a Line6 Guitar Amp module included with Record, and I have the "Master Compressor" on the mixer cranked up too (that master compressor rocks!).

Basically what you'll hear is the loop played clean first, then the Line6 module is flicked on (apologies about the bad timing, there was an inherent latency with my recording setup). Then I begin to drop the envelope amount on the oscillator pitch and around 15 seconds and it all sounds lovely. More wanking with the osc. and filter envelopes ensue, before I move my attention to the "wah" effect on the Line6 module.

I quite like the distortion effects, its different from the Scream module at the very least, which can at times become a little too "obvious".

[Download the sample MP3 here]

Propellerhead's Record (beta testing)

I grabbed myself a copy of the beta version of Propellerheads Record (pirate edition) today. I signed up for beta testing when it was released and I'll probably get my own legal version sometime in June but I decided to try it out today anyway.

First of all, as you can see from the picture, my machine (dual core, 3ghz) wasn't good enough to handle the demo song included, even when I dialed the sample rate back to 22khz. A bit disappointing but the song was fairly complex to be fair, and I can freely create my own songs with lesser modules without a problem. I am fairly certain that this program will be as efficient as Reason when it's released.

So far I've only been messing about with the surface, but already I can see the interface is a huge improvement over Reason 4. You know must of the good things already (like lateral rack mounting etc) but theres also finally a decent way to zoom in and out of the sequencer view, with the use an overview window and drag handles.

Oh and one cute little feature, built in qwerty keyboard support for playback, so no-more messing about with midi-yoke (<--- although still a very useful program).

Anything I don't like about it yet? Yes, and will hate forever: No midi out! A program which was created to record "real" instruments and yet won't allow you to sequence your "real" synths from it, is plain silly!

More to come....

A Super Secret Sexual Fetish

Some people who know me, know that I love eyes, heck even people who just read this blog should know that I have a thing for eyes... and bottoms obviously, but I'm discussing eyes today. Eyes are like the 5th sexual organ, or something. Anyway, that brings me to the hot topic of the Niqaab! The "nick wha?" you ask. The niqāb (نِقاب) comes between the Burqa and the Hijab, when talking about Muslim Women and their fantastical veils of secrecy (collectively known as "Hijab").

The original idea behind these veils is to cover their "Awrah", to stop women worrying about their looks and to conceal their beauty, but boy, did Muhammad get it wrong when he designed the Niqaab; it's like split-crotch panties for your face! It blocks out all the filler and hits you straight with the best part! In case you hadn't noticed, this is a fairly light hearted post about Islamic tradition so I'm not going to bogged down with the exact technicalities of Islamic law regarding modesty. I will say however that Islamic men are obliged to cover up as well as women, something thats forgotten in the whole "bomb them sand-niggers" debate.

So I love these sexy Niqab wearing ladies, whom are collectively known as the "niqābī". I thought I had more to say about this but I guess I don't. It should be noted that the sexiest niqābī are frowned upon by many Muslims, and totally Haram to the fundamentalists. Woman who "tart-up" their Niqab and/or use makeup on their eyes are going against the whole principle of wearing the veil in the first place.

I can't say much about the religious reasoning behind it but I love women of Islam who only expose their eyes, for they are like sexy ninja! And here is the "inspirational poster" I made to prove it!



As a by the way, I've always liked Arabic culture, which of course Islam is a big part of, but the two don't automatically equal each other (only 30% of Muslims world wide are Arabs). Arabic music kicks serious ass (micro tonal ftw!)! Something I've found though, the internet may make the whole world seem more local, but searching for stuff in a language that uses a different alphabet is still quite hard :)

Next week: The mouth, an orifice equal to the vagina?

I'm on Twitter... for real this time

Yes I am on the Twitters now. I was slowly beginning to warm to the idea, after the Java clients I found for mobile devices, but then my Twutter blog failed me during my Eurovision live blogging extravaganza. Blogger said I was posting too much and hobbled me with a captcha for each subsequent blog post. At that very moment, Twitter had won. It was a pretty cool feeling actually, very historic, like an atom bomb on the penis.

http://twitter.com/gamgob

So here is where I'm at on Twitter. Thanks to the people who followed me back when I followed them, and to the others who didn't... here's another reminder. I wouldn't mind but some of the people are ones who said they loved me and my blog, and wanted my babies. Seriously though, I am actually using it so it's well worth following me if you dig my shit.

But why stop with Twitter. Oh I'm whoring up this social media thing big time! Web 2million . 0 and all that bollocks!

I'm on the mother fucking Facebooks... I haven't got a clue how to link to my profile with this, and I had to change my name to "Mary Goblin" because it didn't think Gamma was a real name. I should have called myself "Cunt Ripper" and see what they said

http://www.bebo.com/gammagoblin

The god damn Bebos....

http://www.myspace.com/gamma_

The holy shit MySpaces...

http://my.muxlim.com/gammagoblin/

And the Muxlims.... the Islamic social networking site!

....

You can add me to those if you like but I probably will never use them. The only ones I'll ever be active on are: this blog (Riemann's Cut), my Twitter and my YouTube.com account <--- I favorite the "best" videos on youtube!

I've Got A Throbbing Headache...

For more artistic photos (genuinely well executed stuff) check out [www.dockera.com]. Not all images are gory but there are a lot of penises and vaginas, so be prepared and rubber up!

Why Sweden Is Awesome... #54

There are many, many, many, many, many, many... reasons (<--- Reason heehee, that's another one :D) why the Swedes and Swedenland are awesome, but here's one more: Joakim Widell.



Joakim is part time Opera singer, voice coach, "good looking Mexican" and student person, or something. He's one badass funny mother-fucker too! He's got the funniest shit up on youtube, and the videos arent bad either! He also has a weekly show on blogtv.com where he sings songs about penises, vagina's, and whatever the viewers want him to. Last week, it was about Harry Potter: The Paedophile.


Here he is teaching us some Swedish :) Oh, and it's just before he shaved his head one night live on blogtv. That was the night of the first vid actually, which is why he's referring to his head being like a penis :)

He is currently working on a new rpg game called "Labia Girl". Labia Girl's mission is to find a cure for AIDS, which is what she has... or herpes, it's not for certain yet. Thats the sprite he made for labiagirl, to the left.




Here's his stuff on the net:

[BlogTV]
[youtube]
[Youtube for blogtv clips]
[Twitter]
[MySpace]
[website]
[Pictures and stuff]

I don't want to say anymore cos that might be a bit weird, well, a bit too weird, so I'll let it rest here, but Joakim Widell is like "magic in a box!"

PS One of those "manys" at the start was a link to a post last year that I never published. It's a video of Swedish Nyckelharpa player, Emilia Amper, who was performing alongside Jon Lord on his piece "The Telemann Experiment". It's a wonderful piece of music and is worthy of making it known here.

Crystal Cretins {music}

Rather than post another futile comment on nitro2k01's post*, I decided to wank over an arpeggiator instead. I built the drum pattern then some cheesey bass and twiddled all the knobs as the three chord arpeggio played over and over. Pure wank, but some nice ideas.

Cos you can't call copyright on a three chord arpeggio! Oh and random French vocals for that touch of classy "je nais c'est quais!"

One day I shall stop taking the piss and do a serious song again, but not today.

Crystal Cretins  by  Gamma Goblin

* I was going to say that upon closer listening, the arpeggio sequence in AYO Technology is far more complex than the CC one. There are two patterns being played simultaneously (one is slower and at a lower register)... but let me guess, that just means 50Cent "sampled" it twice, right? >.> And what about the fact that the intro and mini riff's played throughout the song all sound like similar patches, without arpeggio. That 50Cent must be one tricky dude to pull all that off by "cleaning up samples".  People never fail to disappointment me.

Lily Allen needs to STFU and just use a dildo!

I'm sick to death of this whining fucking bitch and her song "You've cum in my ass for the last time" or whatever its called. I hated all he other fucking stuff before now too but this song is really irritating me. A man wouldn't get away with this kind of shit. Imagine if a man came out with a song like this "uh I think you're really lovely, but damn bitch, you just lie there like a sack of potatoes making me do all the work, and its goddamn hard work, what with the state of your face, and that baggy flesh-sock you call a vagina"... no, I don't think a man would get away with it.

So anyway, it came with great love/hate to hear PETA championing her this week in one of their blogs. Basically Allen went on Safari and felt bad for photographing the animals. PETA said this was wonderful, not only did she not attend a zoo but she actually felt bad when she took photos of animals on Safari... all hail the new princess of animal welfare! But hang on a second, she was seen in January wearing a [ugly] hat apparently made of real Arctic Foxfur. She later announced it was fake (nothing like a fur controversy to drum up interest in a new album release). I find fake fur just as offensive (relatively speaking) as real fur. It perpetuates a demand and opinion that animal fur might be bad but it looks and feels "oh so good". Not convinced? Let me give you another example then: "Look here my good man, what do you think of my 'Jew Skin' lampshade... oh, but don't worry though, this is 'fake' Jew Skin!" Speaking of Arctic Foxes, I spotted one in a magazine last week and I found the animal quite striking. I was going to post about it separately as it happens (and no, I'm not a furry).

Right, lets have the song that sparked all this off. Actually before I do that, listen to an old track by Basement Jaxx, "Take me back to your house". I'll think you find the lyrical theme and its electronic psedo-country musical style quite similar. So much for Allen's tune being quirky and different.



Even though I wouldn't be the biggest fan of it, the Basement Jaxx song totally owns that Lily Allen crap. I know the Allen song was only written to sell records, appealing to women who want to bash there men around the head with it, but this could have all been sorted out if she just told that yoke she was going out with, what a selfish cunt he was, in person! He would either sort himself out or have left his last "wet patch on the bed" <--- btw, so much for "safe-sex!" But the lyrics are just there to sell records so whatever... :-\

RTÉGuide Doodles - Gore Effects

I often doodle over old magazines I confiscate from people, especially old copies of the RTEGuide. I started doodling with a red pen with this one and started building up some wounds. They're all inconsistent with each other but ignore trying to figure out their cause. The photos aren't the best either. I discovered* a few years back that you can create interesting colour tones by rubbing at the printed ink. By just using your finger or a rubber eraser, you can easily create realistic skin tones and contour by using the ink thats already there. In this case I just used my fingers to blend in some red and blend out the original pigment. I kept going until the ink started going whitish, which gave a look of stretched, distressed and bruised skin.

  Click For Much Larger Image

What really makes a face look totally fucked up are damaged eyes. With physical trauma an eye will often just have localised bleeding (subconjunctival hemorrhage) where a blood gets trapped under the surface of the sclera (conjunctiva). I put one of these "blood blisters" in each of her eyes here and I think they work quite well.

Click For Much Larger Image

Nothing amazing about the knee gash but you can see how well the "whiting" effect created from rubbing the ink works. I dry dabbled some red pen ink over the top to get the impression of ruptured blood vessels.



* This is the image I first distressed with an eraser back in 2004. You can see how well these glowing eyes sit in with the rest of the image, simply by rubbing away at the ink.

More Shite Talk About Fianna Fail

This is just some shite I am always thinking about, here it is again anyway: Back in the good ol' days (a few years ago) when everyone in Ireland was buying 15 houses and 11 Ferrari's each, Fianna Fail had the mantra "We did it on our own, Fianna Fail created this great thriving economy all on our own." If it were as clean cut as that, then why are we suffering a recession now? Fianna Fail tell you it's because of a global recession, but what happened to the insular Celtic Tiger which they created all on their own? Why not just create another one, out of the same thin air they told us they created the original from. But what then if they now back track, and say it was the global economy that raised Ireland's supposed wealth. Then what good were Fianna Fail to begin with if they were just riding the global wave of good times? Eitherway, they're pretty much a dead party.

The truth is though, Fianna Fail did indeed create the Celtic Tiger... not in a vacuum like they described, the global economy was doing ok as well, but Fianna Fail did indeed craft the Celtic Tiger on top of it.... and look what a sad state of affairs it has left us in. Fianna Fail, created one giant pyramid scheme where Peter built the house that Paul bought, who in turn borrowed the money from a bank and paid vasts amounts of this borrowed cash into the government in the form of taxes. Ireland's entire economy was built on borrowed money. Sure fuck it, a trained ape could do that shit, and you know, when I look back at pics of Bertie Ahern, I think maybe thats exactly what we had: an ape.

WolframAlpha

Still amused with this place... I'm doing all kinds of math with it.. when you search for a person though I'd like a little picture of the person, a little error diffusion picture of the person, or vector art, to suit the style of the site.

I searched for a lot of multi-verse and hyperdimensional mathematica... I got nothing back.. They are currently working on an entry for "Riemann" though, which is exciting.

I searched for "the meaning of life" and yeah, it came back with 42.

WolframAlpha Search Fail

That "Google Killer" WolframAlpha, has gone live. It was touted as being an amazing search engine, with "Terminator" like AI. You are supposed to be able to type in a question in everyday English and it comes back with amazing results. Well I put in a very simple question and I got nothing back. Very disappointed.

I kinda like it though, it's like a condensed wikapedia, with math solving abilities. It's a bit of a novelty at the minute, not sure if I'll use it in the future.

Prision Break is Over... Forever! *Major Spoilers*

Just watched the last episode of Prison Break ever to be made. I'm actually laughing in disbelief at it. I'm writing this because it really is an epic ending, but not in a good way as such. There some big old fuck-off *spoilers* coming up so stop reading now if you're still waiting to watch it. Big ol' pic spoilers too, so if you're going to scroll past, do it quick and close your eyes :)

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For those fools who are still reading this but don't want to know what happens, because their brain is slow to register that fact, I'm going to start off with some minor stuff. Danay Garcia makes a cameo comeback... yay!!! :) It's totally tacked on mind you, she becomes a totally random negotiation piece at one point before appearing again at the "wrap up" segment at the end. It was actually this scene where she had a gun to her head that I said to myself "dear god, the writing in this show has really gone to pot".



Ok so it's a happy ending (at least to begin with), as you might have expected they all get exonerated except for T-Bag who goes back to jail. It's funny how evil they made him in the last episode, as if to remind viewers of the crimes he committed in the past.

Michael's Mother gets shot in the back by Sarah and dies. Michael thanks Sarah. You'd expect stuff like this but not what followed.

There was a "4 years later" moment at the end... and its this that I laughed at. I knew the cast didn't want to do another series but damn, what they included at the end was a bit drastic!



We see The General being strapped into an electric chair... I was like wtf!? lol



We get to see Donald Self in a wheelchair, vegetative and drooling. I know he wasn't the nicest of characters and he had caused the accident which left his wife in a wheel chair, but jeez this kind of extreme karma is a bit too Jewish for my liking. He did plead with the General to take his life and not his wife's in the episode before hand after all.

But here's the kicker, after all his escaping and fighting and breaking back-in again and bullet dodging... at the very end of Prision Break, Michael Scofield is dead! Now how about that for a mother fucking downer! They couldn't just let him ride off into the sunset... no, they had to kill him off!



There will no more series of Prison Break.... ever! I'm glad it's finished but christ, did they need to be so depressing about it all? It reminded me of that episode of the Simpsons where the kill off Poochy. I was nearly expecting to see a spaceship flying down over the grave right before the credits.

[EDIT] One thing I forgot to mention was while watching the first part of the ending (the happy part where Michael is alive) I joked that wouldnt it be funny if blood started dripping from his nose as he and Sara embraced with all the lovey dovey music going. Dang, I was joking like lol Anyway, how could the brain disease kill him? His mother had it and she kept going. He already got the magic op. from the company. Sorry, this ending blows whale dick!

[EDIT 2] Hang on, there are two bonus episodes left which are only going to be released on DVD... maybe it was all (and I mean all, inc. season 1) just a dream!? *rolls eyes*

Eurovision: I am the winner!

I called it! I said Norway would win... Iceland would be my personal favorite.... Azerbaijan had the sexiest bitch.... and the UK might win it if magic happened.

They were the top 4!

1) Norway
2) Iceland
3) Azerbaijan
4) UK

I also said the German entry was shit and it came near last.

And don't forget my near prophecy prediction last year...

I'm the mother fucking Eurovision king... if only that made me sexy!

[Live blog is OVER!]

No expense spared on the banner! This will be updated throughout the night so keep it open (or don't, I don't give a fuck). If you have any problems, view the site directly here.

Live Blogging The Eurovision

So at the moment I'm just fine tuning the megabytes for my integrated live blogging widget. I'll have a post up here later, with the widget embedded for your convenience and pleasure. It's real hi-tech (Twutter blog insdide an iframe lol). It will update itself every 15 seconds. It will either work brilliant or be an epic fail. Either way, major lulz!

Mr. Romantic Is A Jizz Monster

"A North Clare resident who admitted to masturbating while following young women around Galway City may be stripped of his crown as Ireland’s Most Romantic Man.

Northern Ireland-based publication, The Irish Wedding Journal, awarded Aidan Clifford and his partner Ellen Spence the title of Ireland’s Most Romantic Couple following a nationwide competition last week.

It is now understood that the magazine may seek to strip the couple of their title, along with the €46,000 first prize, because of revelations over Clifford’s previous conduct. Clifford was convicted of committing two acts which were offensive to public morals and decency by Galway District Court last year.

He admitted to following women around Galway City in his car while masturbating, on his days off from his Ballyvaughan job. Sentencing in the case was delayed for one year by Judge Mary Fahy and is due to take place in Galway next Monday.

Originally from Kerry, Clifford has been living and working in the Burren area for a number of years. The couple currently live in Kinvara, where Ms Spence has recently launched a new business, while Mr Clifford currently works in Ballyvaughan.

A number of Ballyvaughan residents contacted The Irish Wedding Journal last week, demanding that Mr Clifford be stripped of the prize. The couple beat off stiff competition from dozens of other entries from the whole island of Ireland to win the prize. The couple met on a skiing trip in Italy in January of 2007."

[via]

The History Of The Internet Switchero

Click Images For Bigger!

An art installation by Jon Andrew Davis depicts a physical RickRoll. When I saw this a few months back on nitro2k01's blog I was reminded of the original "image rickroll" used on the internet before youtube existed (sometimes still used by website admin as part of their anti-hotlinking setup). I decided to doctor the image to reflect this. My version is the one on the right.

Some notes on all topics involved:
[Muhammad Cartoons]
[Rick Roll]
[Goatse.cx]

So that's all I wanted to say. This post was really just to archive the image I already made. If you're bored check out this old classic vid of Oprah nearly choking to death on tv, or this funny pic of Britney Spears falling over while pregnant.

Apple To Buy Twitter?

Oh this is good, this is fucking delicious. If this deal goes through I can finally raise my dislike of Twitter from "annoyance" to "pure fucking hatred". An Apple take over will mean that not only does Twitter lack features now but it might possibly have less features in the future. Even if you like Twitter, an Apple take over is not something you should be looking forward to.as Apple are notorious for being propriety and closing down openware. Hmmm... that might mean the end of Twitter's popularity... I'm so conflicted! As much as I hate Jobs I can't see him being crazy enough to pay $700million for a service like Twitter anyway.

Back To Root {music}

You know, I'm having a great time trying out new dnb and electronic musical styles in my spare time, but I realise that I will probably never loose my ambition to make electronic music sound as real as possible, which in turn means I'll probably never get too far with aggressive breakcore, sick dubstep, fucked up wonga jungle etc. I joke around with that kind of music too much to make a serious tune (probably a defence mechanism).

So rather than get depressed about that, over the weekend I just sat down and did what I've spent years doing, improvising on the piano. This is one little ditty I came up with. You could probably class it as spoof-jazz ('jizz' or 'shit-jazz' if you're feeling unkind). Musically its whatever, but what got me most excited is the drumming part. I tried out a few different techniques to get some natural sounding snare 'ghost' notes, and I'm really delighted out how well the whole drum track came out, with relatively little effort too. Not perfect, but it's definitely a great base to improve upon as time goes on.

Production notes: [click track] (FX'd Piano part then Drum Part)quantised... some minor changes made to note velocities in piano track, Was going to remove the last few bars as they're just blah and sound too quantised but left them in and put in a resolving tonic discord to finish. The rest was left alone. All done in Reason. A few more random thoughts about recording drum parts follow below...

Back To Root  by  Gamma Goblin

Not used in this piece but used elsewhere. Record the drum part at a slower tempo. It allows you to get more drumming in and as long as you don't go too crazy when performing, the speeded up recording should sound smooth and tight.

The biggest trick with recording "natural" drum tracks is not to try to lay it all down in one take. Thats what I used always do. It was the easiest way to make sure the drum part wouldn't sound like it was played by an octopus because you were mimicking a real drummer (4 limbs) with your fingers, but it would end up messy and patchy. I used three separate takes for the piece above: "Kick, snare, toms + cymbals". With that setup and practically no planning, you can still manage to avoid the octo-drummer phenomenon, achieve better dynamics, and an overall better and more complex percussion part. And all parts were improvised in one take after each other.

Oh and quantising is your friend: I hated it for years but thats because I was cretin and using it wrong. Quantising artefacts can be heard in this piece too but they can be easily smoothed out when working on a more serious piece of music.

The best sounding drum track will come from a mix of sequenced and recorded parts.

Germany To Ban Bread Knives and Petrol

As if by perfect cosmic timing, a new school "attack" happened just today again in Germany, only this time, all the stereotypes were broken. It was an angry girl, not boy, and not with a bag of guns but a bag of knives and Cocktail Molotoves. Oh the irony... let me guess, it's not that she had social problems, it's because she listened to loud music, played Doom on her PC, and downloaded movies from the Pirate Bay. Oh yeah, bittorrent gives you the mother fucking rage it does!

In other German-knife-killer related news, "experts" have said today that the reason a German man killed stabbed a person in a jealous rage over his girlfriend was not due to underlying deep psychological problems regarding handling rejections, but because "he played online games".

[related post: Germany to Ban Paintball]  [Image: Dawn Of The Dead (1979)]

Porpellerhead Software: "record"

Hmmm... so this is what all the hubbub was about: a new DAW from Propellarhead, in the same vein as Reason. As the name suggests it lets you "record" tracks and is based on the idea of making it easy for "musicians not engineers" to record and arrange music. Well thats good I suppose. Crucially though, if you already have Reason installed it becomes fully integrated with it. Now at the outset thats pretty fucking cool; pretty much what everyone on the planet wanted, but before I see it actually in action with Reason directly, I'll be holding back some of my enthusiasm. I personally wouldn't have much use for this DAW unless all the effects such as time stretching etc. are totally usable and flexible within Reason itself. It they are though, and it's as good as they promise, I'll be totally jizzing in my pants when it's released in September!

I've signed up for beta testing the product, I won't hold my breath though.

Germany To Ban Paintball?

What!? lol Banning paintball? On the grounds that it promotes people to shoot each other in real life!? And laser tag too? Holy fuck, how many happy healthy relationships have started with a "laser tag" first date! lol Wow, you know, the world is really fucked. It's not the "Mad Max" fucked we thought it would be, its the "PC" fucked we all secretly dreaded. I've no interest in paintball or laser tag but this is truly the stupidest reasoning I've heard in a long time. As I commented on this elsewhere....

"They will ban football next, then all sport as they "heighten ones competitiveness in an aggressive manner".

Banning a social activity that discourages a person from feeling alone and isolated, is hardly going to stop an anti-social Billy No-Mates from going crazy with his grand daddies arsenal now is it?

Speaking as someone who has no interest in paintball, I hope whoever came up with this "banning" idea has their throat slit with a bread knife."

The key point above is the fact that these are "social activities". Crazy kiddy gunmen are generally those who feel the world is against them. Sure you get the odd "American Psycho" type killer every now and again, but paintball isn't whats put him over the edge.

You want to do something that stops people going on a rampage? STOP OVER REPORTING KILLINGS IN THE MEDIA! Psycho-loner-kids feel empathy towards other psycho-loner-kids, and if they see how much attention a killing spree gets them, well fuck it, they is gonna get their 15 minutes of fame too bitch!

Christ! Germany hasn't been the same since Hitler died. But hang on, England are thinking of doing the same now too. Ha ha... the world is fucked!

image credit:  Bob Gathany / Huntsville Times

Propellerhead's: "It Is Coming!"

Yes, yes, a lot of stunned looking people in the video... but what is this new piece of magic [software] thats coming.... it better not be another fucking Reason T-Shirt or something.

There's a big ass countdown clock over on the site. It's all very exciting! I might might just shit myself... or not.

[UPDATE] Oh right, they were all just looking at my blog in the vid... yeah I'm awesome!

Dodgy New Burger King Advertisement

'You wouldn't download a hamburger would you?' 4 Swedes get jail sentences and a multinational cash in on the story. I made the ad more juicy though, like extra ass juice in a Burger King burger.

[original via]

George Lee, of Fine Gael

Man Im still fucking disgusted with Lee. Im sitting here scratching me
balls listening to the radio about it. 'Towing the party line', christ
Im going to be sick.

VenomFangX - gone...

For those who care... hardcore Christian-Creationist-Amateur Preacher, VenomFangX has had this youtube account and website closed, apparently at the behest of his disapproving parents. I tended not to follow all that Christian V. Atheist shit on youtube, but this guy was infamous.

It says his parents shut down the site but here's the real story. He recently set up his own Religion and started asking for $1 donations. It's believed that the Church of Scientology successfully sued him for copyright infringement and ordered him to keep walking until he left the universe.

George Lee, RIP

George Lee is dead ladies and gentlemen. That once bastion of sense and economic prophecy is no more. A personal hero of mine, Lee and his funny Segway antics cheered me up even when he said we were all doomed. He always kinda reminded me of Jeffry Combs playing Herbert West in Re-Animator. I could imagine Lee injecting a luminous green elixir into the stock market bringing the economy back to life.

But not now! Now he's quit his job in RTE and wishes to join Fine Gael. Well George, heres what I say to you: GO FUCK YOURSELF! You can go suck my fucking balls along with the rest of the scummy politicians in Dail 'cunting Eireann.

"But Gamma you like David Norris and he's a politician?" Yeah thats right, an "Independent" politician. If Mr. Lee decided to run as an Independent I'd have a fairly different attitude to this news, but not by joining a party as large as Fine Gael. Already Lee has adopted the party line politics of side stepping questions, and changing the subject like a greasy anal snake. He was pressed by Joe Duffy on the liveline today about his standing on certain welfare cutbacks and he refused to answer, whereas before he'd have answered up straight.

You fail George, you fucking fail! "You're being too hard on George Gamma, give the man a chance at least won't you? Who knows, maybe the man could revolutionise Irish politics!" Oh yeah? Three words for you motherfuckers: "The Green Party". Yeah we see what fucking good they did after getting into power. All we need now is Eddie Hobbs to join Labour and we can start stocking up on food and ammo for the civil war.

[oops]

[This was meant to be a post from my phone about George Lee running in politics but I got a phone call mid way and it sent accidentally]

Where Did The Weekend Go?

What? It's Tuesday? What the hell happened to Saturday? It feels like a Sunday at most. I think it proves why I hate sleep so much. Normally at the weekends I stay up late but also wake early, this weekend I decided to catch up on sleep, sleep as long as much as body body wanted. I also tried to get into a good sleeping pattern, as I'm always feeling wrecked during the week days. I even gave a few sleeping tablets a go. Here's some advice to anyone thinking of trying sleeping tablets: DON'T! They don't help you sleep they just make you forget you're awake! They literally turn you into a zombie and you wake up the next day to a trail of zombie destruction.

I don't care if I'm knocking years off my life, and I know sleep makes the quality of your waking life so much better, but I can't help but feel that sleeping is such a waste of fucking time.

The Loveliness of Cork City

We were out in Cork City yesterday, just doing some browsing. We were heading back from Vibes&Scribes when I took this shot over the lee. Just a little hip-shot with my mobile phone. Anyway, as we started down Patrick street we noticed some female "young'uns" playing with balloons; shouting obnoxiously and obscenely gesturing where the balloons could be inserted. These young ladies were all around 12 or 13.

I made the mistake of openly smiling as I passed them, I was enjoying the cretinous behavior of it all. Suddenly a voice from one of them appears: "That guy wit da black hair is laffin at ya!".... "What ya laffin at?"... "Not much!" I answered back dismissingly. "ya wha"... "Ya laffin at my b'loon?".... "Do ya like it up da arse as well?".... "I'd hate to be in a bedroom with ya, with da way ya'r laffin at children".

At this stage I was nearly laughing out loud so its a good thing they had headed off in a different direction and such were no longer in ear shot. While I enjoyed the novelty of the incident, I doubt it would have been much fun if the genders of all persons involved were reversed.

Book-Keeping & Accounts For The 1980's

Spotted this book hidden away on a shelf at work. I draw your attention to the word "Bankrupt" on the cover :) I dirty'd up the image to make it a bit more interesting.

Jesus Has Risen

Not going to say anything, just watch this short Easter celebration FAIL.

Why The Dutch Like Cycling So Much

Man drove through crowd at Dutch Royalty birthday celebrations. In case you don't know he full story watch this video too (I fucking love the picture of the queen they use in that vid). My comment on the whole thing: I guess it's true what they say about Suzuki Swift drivers.

Evil Dead: The Musical

I managed to get my hands on a copy of Evil Dead:The Musical, which I watched last weekend. As the name suggests, it's a musical based on the first two Evil Dead movies, by Sam Raimi. The video above is from a short song from the movie where Ash chainsaws his girlfriends head open. The video is from the original performance but I took the audio from the original cast recording. I had to edit the pacing of the video with time-stretching to lip-sync the whole lot. It's not perfect but it shouldnt be distracting. The arrangement (dmin - Amaj) kinda reminds me of Muse... well Muse with blood and chainsaws :)

I didn't expect too much from the musical. The music was fairly dire, and by dire I mean unimaginative Grease-type musical parodying, and there were some annoyingly laborious bits where they dragged out all the in-jokes... BUT... and it it is a big but (Sir Mixalot size) you would never watch a musical based on the Evil Dead movies for its musical brilliance, you'd watch it just for a laugh, and thats what it delivers. Not in a "jokes by the dozen way", just in a warm fuzzy way, seeing the story of the films played out on stage with songs and stuff.

Anyway, it's bound to either irk you or make you laugh, I can't see too many people just being disinterested in the whole project. Oh, and they were talking about making am movie of the musical.... which would be weird as it would be a movie version, of a musical version of a movie. Groovy!

What Would Make Twitter Good

I always felt that Twitter should be used for middleware only, not as a end service in its own right. Now I see the true genius of my initial vision. Imagine if Twitter was used for all commenting technology across blogs and other web 2.0 sites. Every single comment from everywhere could swarm and merge together and create omni-trends across the net. Make a comment on youtube video about a panda taking a piss, it gets added to the #pandapiss trend on Twitter. Of course, that moronic limitation* of 140 characters would have to go (it has to go eitherway)

* Anyone who calls it a feature is a fucking douche bag.

Ayrton Senna: 1960 - 1994

Ayrton Senna, Brazilian F1 driver who lost his life 15 years ago today while racing at the Imola track in San Marino. I had wanted to mark this day with a special post but I got lazy. Since January I had planned to put up a few pictures of all the newspapers and stuff I saved from the weekend, including the cover of the Autosport magazine before the race, which had the unfortunate headline "Can Senna Take the Pressure?"


I'm not one to say "oh that was 'real' F1 back then and there's too much technology these days", but watching how much a driver had to fight with the car was exciting. Plus whats killed off F1 these days are all the fucking FIA rules and restrictions.

And don't forget the Austrian driver, Roland Ratzenberger who also lost his life at Imola that race weekend. JJ Lato's car burst into flames on the starting grid as well (just something I remember from watching the race 15 years ago).