Global Warming: So Why Is Cork Getting Cooler?

The Rebel county, and all that bollocks? Every other city I looked at had increasing temperatures (London is up by 5 degrees Fahrenheit). I think Cork's cooling has to do with the stellar work done by Cork based Green party member Dan Boyle. He with his magic Twitter account has brought down Cork's CO2 levels. Of course it could also be that the figures for other cities only went back to 1950 and omitted the high temperatures back in the 1930's. Whatever though, it's been proven that "man" is the only reason that the global climate changes. The Mayans died out because Cortez brought not only Smallpox to the South Americas but he also brought drought. You see, the ships in his armada were powered by primitive petrochemical products. Yep seems weird right? But no it's true. You see they had to have been, because the climate changed. And it was the same in Egypt. The great Sphinx shows signs of excessive flood damage but how could something built in a desert show huge amounts of flood damage? Simple! It was actually built in the middle of a lush jungle with loads of rain, but then LL Cool Pharaoh came along and made power boat racing along the Nile popular and whoops, there goes the climate again.

Oh I know the global temperature has shown signs that it has jumped up suddenly in the last 100 years, but I also know that we are showing signs of global cooling also. Truth is, we actually know shit about the climate. The most we know is if we stick our micky out the window and it comes back wet it's raining, that or we just got a blowjob. I'm a strong advocate of renewable and "clean" forms of energy, simply because we need more energy!! Not because driving your car to your grannies might burn a whale or something, but because old energy sources like oil will not be there forever, and we need to invest now! Maybe the climate is fucked because of CO2 and maybe it isn't, who cares! You can't do anything about it. We are eventually going to use up all the oil one way or another anyway, quickly or slowly, there is no doubt about that. Fuck it, lets just blame BP.