Everyone's talking about Mary Davis and her photoshopped election posters. I don't really care enough to do something fantastic, but I did feel like making a bump-map styled gif thing.
Mary Davis: Bump Mapping
Everyone's talking about Mary Davis and her photoshopped election posters. I don't really care enough to do something fantastic, but I did feel like making a bump-map styled gif thing.
DDT: Directly Genotoxic To Human Centipedes
The Human Centipede (2009) was one of the few films made in recent times that I enjoyed watching. Most of this is thanks to the over-the-top acting of Dieter Laser who plays protagonist, Dr. Heiter. It's not that the film makes you want to condone his ghoulish actions, it's just that we don't get any of the normal schlock like we do with other films, where the fate of unlikable victims is crammed down the viewers throat hoping to find sympathetic areas of ones conscience. The film runs very much as a documentary, devoid of all moral responsibility. The only emotional response from the viewer comes when the line "Feed her!" is uttered and through your disgust you know that you're watching a milestone in cinematic history.
It is with great interest then that I follow the progress of the follow-up film, "The Human Centipede: Part 2 (Full Sequence)". Things began to look good when the British Board of Film Classification refused to rate it, and banned it outright, but unfortunately the trailer may tell a different story. It looks cheap and nasty, but not in a good way. I fear it may be a meager cash-in, avoiding any attempt to recapture the qualities found in the original film. Then again, I felt this way when I watched the trailor for the first film, so perhaps we will just have to wait and see.
Twice The Fun, Single Poop In The Litter Tray
Parents, don't you just hate it when each of your children wants a pet of their own but you know you're going to be the one cleaning up all the shit? Well have I got a solution for you! Two-face kitty, a face for each of your children but with just one poop hole for you! Call now for a bonus 5th leg!
"Sept. 28, 2011 photo, a cat with two faces, named Frank and Louie, one name for each face, is held by the cats owner, who identified herself only as Marty, at their home in Worcester, Mass. The animal is known as a Janus cat, named for the figure in Roman mythology with two faces on one head. The owner calls the face on the left Frank, while the face on the right is identified as Louie. (AP Photo/Steven Senne)" [yahoo]
Etching The Back Of My Macbook
I see a lot of people etching the back of their Apple Macbooks these days. It got me thinking whether I should etch the back of mine with a nice design. I was thinking about it for a while now. The design that keeps coming up is one that was inspired by an image I saw on the internet once. It's a woman with an apple wedged between her buttocks. It just seems to sum up everything that I think of when I think about Apple. It's sexy, it's curvaceous, it's hip, it's even a little cheeky. But ultimately it underlines my long standing feeling for the company: Apple, so full of shit.
Prof. Brian Cox
I sketched this lovely portrait of celebrity physicist, Professor Brian Cox. Using this image alone can you guess what I think of this man? No cheating now please. And enjoy the bonus preparatory sketch I made below.
Proof That Facebook Is For Psychopaths
I apologise to my readers for the graphic above, I know some of you are delicate little dainties, but this is too important to let be. Facebook wants to own you, and allowing you share what music you listen to is just the beginning! Don't be lulled into a false sense of security, the music is dangerous! And now it seems that even if you "log-out" of Facebook, the Zuckerberg can still track you! All your Poke are belong to us!
But is it Zuckerberg that you should be worried about? What if your new "public stream" is being followed by one of the individuals that 'Like'd the above post [if you are inclined to want to look at a dead girl with her abdomen festooned by her bowels, then I'll let you find the post yourself]. What if you actually accept a Friend Request by one of these people. Good lord, these people could be friending your children! Your daughter might be arranging to meet up with these people right now! Stop it, people! The Facebook is an evil place. Shut it down. Shut it all down. Shut down the internet. Burn your modem! Climb under the bed and don't come out until I signal you. But not by phone, the Fuckerberg can track you with that too. You better burn your phone. Wait for me to call to your door. You'll know it's me because I'm the one that looks like Jesus.
Generating Images From Dreams
Above is a near identical facsimile of a scene from a dream that I had on Friday morning. I can't recall what the dream was about, but for some reason I had to create a new Blue Screen Of Death graphic and I came up with this, (probably too many thoughts about Windows 8 recently).Skip ahead to Friday lunch time; watching SkyNews, where I catch the tail end of a story which was being reported as: "Scientists generate video stream from the mind of a test subject. Recording your dreams may be the next step!". The video below was being played .
I got quite excited! This seemed like the future was here. Oh silly, silly me! Later that day I get on the Net and search for the story. It turns out the boffins "only" managed to create a montage of video from other video that was similar to the video that the test subject was looking at. Admittedly, that's pretty amazing too, but NOT what the news reports were making out.
Also, I was very surprised by the amount of people worried about this. Personally, I think the idea is fucking awesome. Think of the blog-content I could generate from the maelstrom of my mind. It would be deliciously horrific!
A Hard Disk Loaded With Apple Doccaments'
Apple drumming up more hype... more hype for more crap! I lol'd
What's Going On With Operating Systems
Windows 8 is designed around the touchscreen "Tiles" design of Windows7 Mobile. Microsoft have said "this is it, it's not a shell, there will be no 'classic' GUI included".
Ubuntu 11.04 introduced the Unity interface, which combined the Desktop and Netbook versions of Ubuntu into a single distribution. Mark Shuttleworth has said that the 11.10 version of Ubuntu will only come with Unity and will not include the ability to log in using the Gnome2 "Classic" interface.
Apple's current OS X "Lion" comes with a method of launching applications called "launchpad". Launchpad brings up a grid of icons much like the interface of their OS on their mobile devices. Apple being Apple, they can force any interface they like upon their users and may very well consolidate their OS X and iOS interfaces
This is something I already mentioned when I discussed Windows 8 a few months back, and I'm surprised I've not heard it elsewhere. How is it that the three major desktop operating systems are all independently moving in the same direction regarding the future of user interfaces? Coincidence? Natural technological convergence? New World Order?
Is the desktop dead? That's what some are saying when discussing Windows 8. That's a hell of a big one to accept, considering that Microsoft's current business is the desktop. Which leads me to wonder if Windows 8 is going to be an automatic replacement for Windows 7 at all, perhaps both will be sold alongside each other, which admittedly, was a disaster when they were forced to do something similar with Vista and XP. But this is Microsoft, a company who love to give the user choice, so much choice they can hang themselves with it. Maybe Windows 8 will come in a version where a "classic" shell is bolted on top of it, maybe that's the way it will go. Windows 8 at the it's core will be all those tiles and stuff, and desktop users will get a alternative shell.
It's a scary future, with all platforms heading in the same direction. I'm hanging onto XP for dear life!
No Way Man, Colm Murray Is Forever!
This is in rebuttle of BMD's outlandish suggestion that Colm Murray should be left die in peace. No way, dude. They is gonna pump Colm full of techno so that he can still make the news every night. You wait and see. Colm is gonna be the god damn 256 Billion dollar NAMA man! That's where the money has gone by the way, into R&D for Colm's cybernetics. Just wait and see man. Colm is not only gonna rise from his wheel chair but he is all gonna rise from the ashes, like a mother fuckin' phoenix, yo! Colm Murray for president!
The Sociopath Network
I just watched The Social Network (2010). I am confused, for 2 reasons.
The Mark Zuckerberg depicted in the film is clearly a sociopath. He goes beyond the realm of mere autism and into the murky depths of psychopathy. This is the first problem. How did they get away with depicting the man like this? Why hasn't Zuckerberg sued for defamation? Surely this is falls into the area of being liable? Unless of course, this is a true depiction of Zuckerberg; he really is this that scary and doesn't care if you know it. And that's the second problem.
It leads me to ask the question: If you have seen The Social Network, and you still have a Facebook account, are you fucking insane!? At this very moment, Mark Zuckerberg is rooting around your private pics, jizzing in his pants! The man is a maniac, a MANIAC!
Nine Eleven
"It was nearly 10 years ago, that a bright September day was darkened by the worst attack on the American people in our history."Perhaps one should give President Obama the benefit of the doubt and just assume that his speech was badly written. Perhaps when he said "in our history" he actually mean't "in living memory", because surely the worst attack on the people of America was the mass extermination of indigenous peoples during the period of America's colonisation.
Barack Obama - May 1, 2011
Bill Gates Is Dead
According to this "documentary", he was assassinated in 1999. Very Strange, very strange indeed. I wonder if there was a follow-up documenting Steve Jobs' death from ebola. Nothing So Strange (2002) [imdb]I came across this film when looking up to see if Bill Gates played himself in The Social Network (2010). He didn't. The person who played him, played him in this film as well. And that person was Steve Sires [imdb]
My Politics Come From The Barrel Of A Gun
No, no, this has nothing to do with Anders Breivik murder campaigns. Nor is it even a reference to Mao Tse-Tung. No, the title simple refers to the spread out pattern of my political beliefs, much like the shot pattern generated by a shotgun being fired at a target, as the illustration gives example to.
As you can see from it, most of the shot (dots) are concentrated around the center but they do spread out in all directions, with rogue impacts appearing far left and far right, upwards and downwards. These represent individual topics or cases. There are 4 basic vectors here in this example but it can be as complex as you want it to be.
I know some people who would describe themselves as sitting inside one quarant of the circle, completely. From my interactions of these people, they show very ability for independent thought. They show no individuality, no free thinking, they must consult someone elses book of rules to know what to think (see: religious nuts and "thems holy Bible words"). They can even sometimes show strange paradoxes in their stance where they go against what they actually stand for (take for example, hardcore liberalists: "You have the right to choose; let no one to choose for you; you MUST choose yourself!").
Look at an example website many use to discover their political stance in life [http://www.politicalcompass.org/test] You'll see many of these on the internet. You are asked a bunch of questions and then the average all your answers and place your dot in a quadrant. Rubbish! I am not an averaged dot within a two dimensional plane! That's another dot on my shotgun blast of political beliefs: "am not a single dot person". Thanks.Some people who sit on one side of the fence often have a revelation and decide that because they don't agree with one thing in their political stance, they throw the baby out with the bath water, and jump sides completely, which is really only changing the flag on a ship that is always sinking. Whereas with a system like the one I've outlined, beliefs are always moving, always being challenged by internal opposing forces. The only problems arise are when two opposing views seem to garner equal value and a thought process can spiral off into dichotomy. For better or worse, this will never happen to "belt and braces" supporters of one side, because their "faith" in a political stance guides them blindly through all paradoxes. I would rather have a stance (or lack there of) where I am challanged to make up my own mind, rather than having it made up for me, by blind ignorant loyalty. And now, an animation of a NASA cat...
Man Made Sun
Mirror Fusion Test Facility Magnet
[Year:] 1980.The world’s largest superconducting magnet was built for the Mirror Fusion Test Facility (MFTF) to confine the plasma. It became Lawrence Livermore Laboratory's (now Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory) largest construction project at $372 million after the scope of the project was enlarged. The magnet’s conductor consisted thirty-miles of copper and niobium-titanium wire wound over a year’s time into the magnet’s “yin-yang” shape. The stainless steel casing allowed liquid helium to be pumped through the magnetics for cooling. This brought temperatures in the vessel to 425 degrees below zero Fahrenheit. The 350-ton device produced magnetic fields 150,000 times that of Earth’s while using only 50 watts of power.
The Mirror Fusion Test Facility, or MFTF, was an experimental magnetic confinement fusion device built using the magnetic mirror, or so-called "yin-yang" design. It was designed and built at the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory (LLNL), one of the primary research centers for mirror fusion devices. The project was canceled just before operation was to start.
Following on from the earlier Baseball II device, the facility was originally a similar system in which the confinement area was located between two horseshoe-shaped "mirrors". During construction, however, the success of the Tandem Mirror Experiment ("TMX") led to a redesign to insert a solenoid area between two such magnets, dramatically improving confinement time from a few milliseconds to over one second.[1] Most of the fusion power would be produced in the long solenoid, the yin-yang magnets serving only to dam up the ends in order to maintain good plasma confinement in the solenoid. Limited to break-even energy balance, the magnetic mirror endcaps actually consume power, but much less than that produced in a solenoid of sufficient length. The new version, officially MFTF-B, started construction in 1977 and was completed in 1986, on the very day the project was canceled by the Reagan administration Department of Energy. No experiments were performed. Rollbacks in fusion research funding dramatically reduced funding levels across the entire field.
Sources [flickr] [wikipedia] : Content shared originally on meine Soup.io
Sources [flickr] [wikipedia] : Content shared originally on meine Soup.io
Woman Makes Me Laugh By Wobbling Her Boobs
Laughing at this is quite surprising. I can think of two reactions I would normally give to such a sight*, but neither is laughter. I think Patrick Norton, rolling around the place, helps it along. And Yes, the Tekzilla addiction is all because of Leo Laporte. I wasn't lying, you know.
"I was just showing you, how the Cthulhu swims..."*[I know you're wondering] either prude or rude. I can't mention Leo without including something, so here he is, asking you a question and telling you a little about himself.
Veronica Belmont, 2009.
If The Pizza Leaves A Bad Taste, Try An Apple
A bonus 10 points for anyone who names all the movie references. The video is one from the vaults, but has been remastered, a-la Steven Spielberg/George Lucas, to cash in on the extra lulz.
While we're on the topic of bad taste, lets switch things up a bit and talk about Steve Jobs. I heard a lot of people saying that over the last 15 years, Jobs put his heart and soul into Apple. That's all very well, but that still doesn't explain where his liver ended up.
Lacoste Are Douche-Bags
"Lacoste executives have written to the Oslo police demanding the terrorist to stop wearing their clothes, labeling it “a PR nightmare.” An Oslo police spokesman told The Telegraph “The company feels that such a man sporting their clothes could do considerable harm to their reputation.” Which is almost as idiotic as Abercrombie & Fitch writing to The Situation telling HIM not to wear their clothes. It represents the worst of the worst of the fashion industry’s elitism. You don’t get to dictate who is ALLOWED to wear your clothes, people. You’ve made a product and put it on the open market. It’s out of your hands. Writers cannot pick and choose who reads their books. McDonalds cannot tell fat people they are ruining their brand by eating there. And designers cannot control who wears their clothes. Period. Get over it." [WoW Report]
Seventy seven people dead and Lacoste's response is "a PR nightmare"? Fucking dumbass cretins. Mind you, the toothbrush moustache never did recover from the whole Hitler thing, but considering how some models are discovered these days (photoshoots of women battered on stair-wells etc.) and how shoes are advertised, I deem that having your logo across the chest of the most infamous person in the world (now that Bin Ladin is "dead") can only be good for business.
Oh and it appears that Anders Breivik wants you to give money to Wikipedia again. Oh man, again!? Funny how he has the same name as that other guy. Well that's the way it looked on the page anyway!
Some Updates & Shit
This has been a slow start to September for me, and I apologise for that. I've got loads of ideas for blog posts to abuse your senses with but no motivation. Peoples cretinism levels have been at an all time high this past week, and that's been draining me of good vibes. The following montage sums up pretty much how I've been feeling.
Things are better now though, I've been dancing and everything. I've even updated my Google+ profile, with pretty pictures. They are representative of elements of me, or my interests, or something. I replaced all the "please don't delete me, Mr. Google Man" with real facts and figures about me too. You should follow me on Google+ because I am regularly posting unique content there. You don't have to sign up, my stuff is public, which you can subscribe to via RSS. If you do want to sign up though, you can use this URL to get an invite.
I still like Google+; there's no one on it; that's my kind of social media.
I've Recently Become A Fan Of Leo Laporte, So...
[ Leo Laporte ] [ Deal With It - Meme ]
The only thing I have against him is that he occasionally reminds me of Bertie Ahern, which is a bit like tasting dog shit in your mouth when a lovely big pizza is presented in front of you. Leo Laporte also reminds me of a few Computer Science lecturers I had in college, except that Laporte actually knows what he's talking about.
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